Blood 

 

The neck was pulsing 

Blood, pumping,red, a fountain against the green of the  grass.

The eye was looking around in panic .

Before stopping on the boy.

He just stood there

Palms,open. 

Frightened into shock

Staring at the beast

It’s large muscles trembling 

It’s left front leg 

Hanging from the skin,split in the middle 

Like the string from a snapped bow and arrow 

Like so many sticks the boy used to break over knee 

He’d heard the shot while exploring the woods.A single boom…the percussion shaking the earth,wildlife scattering,coyotes bellowing in the distance…

He came running — only slowing when he saw the horse…laying there in the open…tied to a tree.Leg,split…and a fountain of blood from the gun shot …pumping with every heart beat….

This will be his first encounter with death.

The Matrix 

 

the matrix (1999) 

Remember The Matrix?. I do. Mostly,because I drank a Surge and got a big dose of nostalgia for things like Surge,Hi C, and things that happened in 1999

This was a great film and even better trilogy.IF you rented it. it had that cool aspect that only films in 1999-(the year the world was ending.Was the Y2K even real? What was real?) overpacked with information-featuring robot bugs digging around in someone’s stomach could have.(you know you remember) However,when it was on TV–Back when good things were still on the Television.Like Friends and Frasier and remember that Yahoo commercial? Man,who would’ve thought Google would crush that.But like I was saying…when it was on TV …you got a whole other film…I know …because I tried to watch it when I was like …I don’t know…Ten or so…and keep in mind…I’m Ten. The longest film I’ve seen is Jurassic Park.Saving Private Ryan. Maybe,Gone With The Wind …it always took a whole weekend much to our dismay (it was my sisters favourite) There was no Netflix.Google was only a year or so out of the box. Cell phones had green screens and you were lucky if you got to play Tetris. What I’m getting at is this.

Unless it was Saturday morning and you were Spiderman Or Batman…maybe Gundam Wing…or Dragon Ball Z …I did not have time for you. I was an active kid…I had 40 acres of Woodland territory to get lost in…(much to my parents hopes I’m sure) 

But back to the matrix.

This thing is such a different film on TV. I’m sitting there. Neo is in leather and sunglasses. Dodging bullets.Effing bullets!! I get up to get pop corn or I don’t know …use the bathroom…make a sandwhich. Come back. Hey-ho! New film! Dude’s on a space ship vomiting everywhere! With ports in the back of his neck…Get up for more drinks that were NOT Surge (I had a heart thing that would not permit the consumption of Surge) and come back,Neo is dodging bullets again!! 

I thought for like two years these were two different films. Seriously. Until we had a marathon of the thing at a friends house. 

So yeah.I watched the whole thing again a couple of years ago…made sure I had my food …my beverages and wouldn’t miss a thing. and you know what. I still have no idea what it’s about. But occasionally I may quote 

“Good evening Mr. Anderson.” 

To show that I was there…

One heart Knife syndrome 

   

 

 They say that caring is finite 

And need is eternal ….

A doctor breaks down on a rooftop 

Or maybe in the stairs …

They say that every Monday morning 

Pastors and psychiatrist’s

turn in their resignation

And notices ….

They say that love will grow old 

And weary 

And we will grow tired and wary 

Familiar with knives and all too numb…

But sleeping on a plane 

I saw you 

It hit me right between the eyes 

You and me 

See how we are 

You and me 

See who we are

Sleeping on the wires —

Triggers for all the ghouls and all the shadows —

It’s all right 

We know who we are 

So we give 

We give 

Until the world turns

And all the triggers 

Are houses for memories 

And I love …

You and me 

See how we are.

 

Together

 

In the midst of everyone 

All the faces 

All the people 

Everything that could be 

Could’ve been

But isn’t 

It’s you 

Every night 

Every moment 

Every day 

Kiss me 

And start fires 

In my lungs 

Hurricanes in my soul 

Meteor showers 

Under my skin

I simply 

Believe 

our love could 

eclipse the universe.

And anything 

Against us.

 

New York #10

  (Photo origin unknown)

Did you know,that in WWII…Hitler wanted his generals to burn down Paris …but they looked at the city…and  they just couldn’t….the idea of saving it ‘s historic pieces …was to great.To be able to look at them…years later…and know…’I could have destroyed that…but I chose to save it instead.’

Too bad they couldn’t all feel the same about saving a race of people ….

I’m sorry I’m rambling again 

I was just looking at a photo Sara took…it’s hanging above her couch…Her place is small,but nice.’efficient’ is the term she uses.Doesn’t believe in wasting space. 

She walks out of her room, red hair,pulled back into a messy bun.Hands me a large Yellow envelope….and just stairs at me with her big green eyes. 

“Take it…it’s nothing…I just thought you might want them.”

I tear open the corner 

And there they are

Black and white images 

Of Laura, working on stage…directing actors….Laura …sitting in a window…looking out at the people of New York 

My chest feels heavy….

“When did you take these??”

I ask 

Sara just shrugs and pours some coffee 

“A few months before the accident…how are things with you? We haven’t exactly heard from you and it’s been a while since I see you around.”

She sat down on the floor beside the window ,crossing her legs…lighting a cigarette.

“I’m ok.i took a journalism internship…but i had to go to Louisiana… Just a bunch of old jobs …stories on culture…things like that.”

“Sounds good”

“It was…I really needed to get away,ya know?”

“Yeah….I can’t really take much photographs anymore…I have this thing with my eyes…I just can’t see.”

“What?,why didn’t you say anything? Have you had it checked out?”

“No,no,I don’t have to…it’s genetic …I know how this works.”

She shrugged and got up,crossing the floor.

“Sara,look,I’m sorry…I know I haven’t been around…I left real fast.like,real fast.and I’m sorry. But…I had to….I just want to be a good writer…I want to write something that matters…something good.and I’m really sorry,you should have been able to reach me.”

She turned around and looked at me.

I kind of felt sick then 

Because I realised 

Everyone is older now 

and some of us are dead 

Some of us are going blind 

And for me 

The world just kind of felt numb 

And I just kind felt stuck 

And I felt real selfish

And ashamed 

“You could always tell me anything,josh.you didn’t have to leave like that….and all of us had plans…I don’t know what I’m going to do…I have seen wonderful things …I regret nothing…I don’t have to see anything else.especially if i have you two.” 

Sara looked out the window 

And I realised just then 

How there’s so many people in New York 

But yet 

We still have only a few 

And we still feel alone sometimes 

And if  we are lucky to have these few …who stay close …we should definitely keep them. 

In your arms

  

Heavy,

I feel so heavy in your arms 

And I know you can see 

You can see straight through me 

And all the weather 

And all the sea

Can come and drown me 

I feel so ….

My soul leaving me 

I’m letting go 

Of everything 

These things that seperate me 

Bones and flesh 

Ash and shadows 

I’m leaving it all behind 

I feel so 

Heavy 

Heavy in your arms 

But you still carry me 

And all stays the same 

Your love,

Never leaves.