So you think you’re a man

The world is changing …
Or maybe its always been this way?
Who is to say
Some men hate women
Just the sound of their voice
can set them off

Today a man gets mad
Because eggs
He has noticed
Have gotten smaller
This is unacceptable
He wants answers
The problem ?
A lady answers the phone
Sweet lady
He chews her out relentlessly
She gave the phone to me
And I let him wait on hold
Just long enough to assure him
That whatever he has to say
Has already been brought to me
He doesn’t pitch a fit
When he hears my voice
He catches and then begins again
You wouldn’t have known he was ever mad .

Men , husbands , guys ….
We’ve all seen it
It’s strange how angry some of us are
And how some of us use women
We don’t have a standard
We don’t have a method
We have no accountability
No character
We use checking accounts poorly
We steal their money
We lie
And lie again
I deal with these things daily
Men who walk around
like they just came off
Mens fitness
who women fall all over
Can’t handle their money
Can’t hold a job
Use women who have children
Use women who work hard
Use women who have trust issues
Get them to open up and bam
Let them down again and again
And yet they play a good game
Women fall all over them

And I’m like
If you only knew …
You’re about to be used .

Cause I get the call about the checks
I see small things that lead to big things
It’s much like a bar
Not the whole scene but … It’s close .

And I ask ….
Since when did we fall so far ?
What happened ?
Where are the cool guys ?
The ones I looked up to growing up ?

Surely there wasn’t just ONE

We’re either Mr mom
Super feminine and useless
Womanizer
Or just plain consumed by business

I have no idea what happened
where have all the men gone ?
What the heck happened to my country?
Where’s the cowboys ?
The husbands ?
The leaders?
The business men ?
The risk takers?
The guy who goes out and gets things done!

Now we walk around looking like muscle magazine
or GQ with a character and personality ? That would do well for a snake or poodle
This guy is NOT going to fight for you
Much less pursue you
Or keep you
But he IS very likely
Going to use you
Its crazy

I’m sick of seeing it
I’m sick of all the Christian guys
Who have a list that could span the state
Of rules and standards
Expectations
I’m sick of all the guys who
Are rednecks who have a list of plays and methods
I’m sick of sitting around watching
Guys use women objectively
I’m sick of guys telling their sons
To hate women
I’m just tired …

Here’s my opinion
And it’s probably not going to go over well ….

I have dated very little
But I am aware there are differences
In men and women
How we think
How we communicate
That is the greatness in it
Can you imagine being on a date
With someone exactly like yourself ?
It’d be pretty boring
No mystery no spark
No attraction no connection you’d
Know everything just before it happened
Know what they were thinking
And not in a romantic way
More like in congratulations
You’re dating yourself kind of way
Way to go
Pretty bland
Unless of course
You’re a narcissist to the ninth degree
Just set up a mirror or something
Across the table

I don’t know for sure ….
But I think …
this goes deeper than
” if you like someone go for it ”
” no one is ever too busy ”
Yadda yadda yadda

I’m saying , it’s a character flaw
We’re told things growing up
“You deserve ”
We have this thought pattern
If she doesn’t do this ….
If he does that …
I deserve …
It’s my right …

Relationships ?
Don’t stop your life bro …
Keep planning keep dreaming .
Don’t base your happiness on another person . Cause people change , you change …. Our very personality is constantly changing .
You will be let down if you start orbiting that person and making every single thought and action based on what they are doing .
Plus , that’s just weird .

Relationships are getting to know how to function WITH someone.
what makes them tick . What makes them, them .
The good the bad and the ugly .
It takes time .
You learn to live and grow WITH someone which is progress it’s moving forward . which is healthy .
Living AROUND someone is possessive and restraining to said person and it stunts your growth .

Make a life
Set goals
Create a life that is worth living
Don’t spend all their money
All their time
All their patience
Don’t be another child
They don’t need to be your second mother .
They want a friend and a lover .
Not another girlfriend
They want us to be MEN.

Life in general ?
We don’t deserve anything
We have no right to anything
We have got to start creating things again
We have got to start being accountable again
We have got to stop being just another copy of a copy of a copy

Someone made it too easy
To hate
To do nothing
To be complacent
In war
I learned from Band of Brothers
If you sit still
You die
It seems like the thing to do
Sitting still in a ditch
But
You DIE
You must be consistent
You must keep moving
You must ….

I could really go on and on
I just really have stopped and looked around
And this is a big deal
We are raising children
Who will live and think
Based on our example
Not what we say
But what we do

I’m tired of seeing all the mistrust
The defense
The hurt
People opening up
Only to be judged by someone with a list .
People … Being human .
Maybe it’s only human .
What are we doing ?
What am I doing ?
Shouldn’t life be about growing
Being connected
Giving love
Intimacy
Learning what makes you , you
And me , me .
All the scars
All the wrinkles
All the smile lines
And the dark circles under our eyes
What put them there ?
What’s your story ?

Who are you ?
And if we connect in such away that the sun and moon eclipse
Then ill add your fire to my last name
If that’s what you wanted

That’s what this should be
To me ….

Our kids are watching us
They will take the lead
Not because of your advice
But because of your example
How you lived
How you treat people
How you loved

What are you doing
Who are you ?
Who are we ?
And what are we building
What are we leaving
Where are we going ?
Or
are we just
a copy
Of a copy
Of a copy

One thought on “So you think you’re a man

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