Green eyes and a heart of gold


” I just never thought I’d feel this alone.I feel like I’m shutting down
And I never shut down.”

She has these green eyes
That will just stop you
This contagious smile
And enthusiasm for life and the arts
We just clicked
And she’ll never let me forget
Calling her from the hospital
Completely high on pain meds at like 2am (I have no memory of this by the way)

I couldn’t help thinking…
How many of us
Are starving for affection
I think,to feel completely isolated
And alone is a much greater pain
Than anything
I know that pain
It almost killed me …



“Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.”

“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”
– Mother Teresa

So we talked
We were real with each other about things that have been going on in our lives these past years …

Really love the people around you
Just be real
We have enough fake people
Running around trying to make it
Isn’t about time we started touching
The soul ?
Rearranging the heart?
Rather than just touching the eyes…
This is about people
This is life
Walking beside them
Loving them
Learning them
And just being there
Being there when they need us
Letting them know it’s ok ….
It’s ok.
What we are feeling
What we are going through
All of it.
It’s ok.

And trying to be strong
Isn’t going to help us make it
We are strong already
Depth comes from vulnerability
My friends
they are all women
And they are all fiercely independent
And I love it
strong and admirable
It’s one of the reasons I write so much about them …


But one thing we all have in common?
Darkness,it’s the loneliness
The emptiness
And so we look out for each other
They feel when I need them
And likewise

Just be real
Your feelings are ok
Your heartache is ok
The feeling of change
The desire to meet
the future with bright
Rather than blood shot eyes
All of it
Is real
And it’s ok
You’re doing better than you know
This right now is our lives
And none of us know what the hell we are doing
And that’s ok
Just remember
You are never alone


2 thoughts on “Green eyes and a heart of gold

  1. So happy to have found you. I haven’t been able to stop reading your words. Such depth. I wish I could speak the way you write.

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