Let the great world spin (25)

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Birmingham
I heard about a man
Who cuts his skin
And does heroin
to say it’s his body
I knew a girl
She closes herself emotionally
To say it’s her body
That was then
But
after all these years
We’re still dying in cages

The walkway
The native who smells bad
everyone avoids him
Like so much water
Around stones
Wearing the same clothes
Day by day
He just looked up at me
And told me about Korea
About his pain
While another man
Clean and sharp
But with hallow eyes
told me about
Normandy
And
After half a century
We’re still dying in foxholes
Trying to get it right…

25
Now I’m at my window
Is 25 halfway to 50?
midnight halfway to morning?
depression halfway to empty?

if I said
I want you next to me
But still crave
An empty window
To write in
Would you understand?
I feel, everything
Everyone
In a room
I feel everything you say
Before you say it
I hear it
In that space
When your eyes look at the floor
Then dart back at me
Just before you speak
And would you understand
That I’m not boasting
I’m not
Not everyone is like this
It is the most isolating thing I’ve known.
So I want you
I want your body
Your lips
I want to love you like a blind man
Feeling every part of you
Reading you like Braille
Until you come apart …
But I’m still this person
I’m still me.
25
Somewhere
Between 50
And half empty.
Trying.

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