Beagle in the City #231

Ethan: ok boys let’s take some pictures. Simon I got you a present. It’s a NEW-

Simon: Bone! Antler! Wait wait ! Chew toy! Brother!

Ethan: Christmas sweater!

Simon: Really!! Yes!

Ethan: Garf, you have to stay still. Still. Be still.

Garf: Hey Lady!

Ethan: This isn’t working.

Simon: Like this Garf. As still as a statue…

Simon: This is why I get the good stuff, like sausage biscuits and peanut butter and jellies…

Lindz: You’re not supposed to be getting any of those things…

Simon: I mean dried kibbles and waters…

Ethan: Good save bud.

Simon: Have a swingin’ Chrissmas…

Ethan: Not yet buddy,

Simon: Oh ok. Have a swingin’ Thursday!

Ethan: It’s Monday but better.

Simon: What’s a Monday.

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Beagle in the City #230

Simon: Hello, father? I would like to make an order for midnight snacks… one pizza, one coffee, and extra breadsticks. Can you just put it all in a trash can?

Ethan: Simon, I’m at work.

Simon: Oh it’s ok. You can just leave it at the door!

Ethan: How about something different

Simon; What are we having tonight?

Ethan: Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches .

Simon: I like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!

Beagle in the City #229

Simon: what is it?

Ethan: it’s the new porch Cat.

Simon: I’ve never seen one so close before! I thought you were just make believe tales!

Garf: Cat! Kill it! Bark! Bark! (Cough! Hack ! weez!)

Cat: Hello dumb dumb. Be a good dumb dumb and lie down. Good boy.

Simon: My name is SIMON and I am a shelter dog, this is my parents, they adopted me. That’s mom and that’s dad. I like grass, do you like grass? You’ve probably seen lots of grass and sticks. Do you like to dig? I saw a bird yesterday, it was pretty cool.

Cat: you’re funny, I saw a bird today,

Simon: really! Maybe it was the same

Cat: and then I killed it.

Simon: wha…why .. why…

Garf: Haaack! Cough! I told you, they are evil. We have to kill them all. Before you know it they get moved inside and you’re on the streets!

Simon: Oh that would never happen. I sleep under covers and with a pillow…

Garf: What! I thought you had a cage..

Simon: I mean, I sleep in my crate, because it’s my crate, and no one else’s crate. it’s practically my favorite place to be.

Cat: you’re both prisoners. You get that right?

Garf: We get three meals a day!

Cat: oh, you mean, like a prisoner?

Garf: Kibbles and water! Sounds like Thangs Givings to me!

Beagle in the City #228

Simon: Hey dad. That sure looks good. Is it snack time?

Ethan: Go away, you can’t have cereal.

Simon: But we always share sandwiches.

Ethan: That’s different.

Simon: You have to share dad, because you have to love me, it’s the law!

Ethan: What the crap? Where did you get that? I might have to take care of you. But it’s not the law that I have to love you.

Simon: Yes it is! Because of the day we first met and we became best buds.

Ethan: You are still not getting cereal. But I will make you a sandwich…

Ethan: Hey, have you ever seen The Natural? It’s a baseball movie.

Simon: I love baseball!

Garf: You two would never make it in the streets.

Beagle in the City #225

Garf: FOOD! What do we have today, every day I have something different. Maybe it will be beefs or maybe it will be chickens. Who knows. Nice man, my man, the good man, he’s such a good hunter.

Simon: You think he knows we always eat the same meal. The hard cubes?

Garf: Hold on guys, just a miffin, I have to check your bowl, OH salmon!

Ethan: No. I don’t think he knows. Everyday is a surprise for him.

Simon: you know who I was thinking about today. Our friend the pizza girl.

Ethan: No. that costs money.

Simon: What is money?