New York #2

Women + Men

IMG_5271.JPGimage origin

“I don’t know…”
Sara was staring straight ahead with her camera …taking shots of old people in the park
And animals …
Her flaming red hair spraying out
From her hoodie
I looked at her for a second
Shaking my head I asked again
“Are you really ok?”
“No…we were together for 7 years
And then he just left…
I don’t know if I can do this again…”
She was always the strong one
In the group
Her British accent
Tattoos and camera
She seemed untouchable
Until she started dating again
And then reverted back to
This …person…
Who couldn’t make a decision
But in her defence
Her previous relationship
Had been something else
“Jared looked at me like he didn’t know me …and then he just left…”
She took a shot of an old couple asleep on a bench ….

I sighed …
“Well,you can’t stay in bed all the time…you have to get out more …
Turn these pictures in…”
I kicked the curb ….sending pigeons flying around in a panick

“You turn in your manuscript??”
She was genuinely concerned
“No…I can’t finish it…”
“Are you still seeing Laura?”
“Yeah,but I don’t know…I think so…she’s a screen writer …I mean we essentially do the same thing …and I don’t know…it seems to be going well…”
“I think I’m a lesbian…”
I stopped …
“What? I helped you pack when Eric cheated on you…you just got through telling me about jared having a hard time because…”
She laughed
“I know I know…but I don’t know how to be myself in a relationship…
But with women …I can do that…it’s very freeing…I can breathe …”

“Well,I’m not telling jared..”
“Neither am I …I’ll just let it run its course..”

“You are fucking insane …”

“Maybe but at least I’m not afraid to turn my manuscripts in or ask a girl to marry me”

I grabbed her camera and shot a bar across the street
“That’s just unnecessary cruelty …I’m not getting married anyway…
You need to talk to Jared
He needs to understand what’s going on he fell in love with
A strong woman who made decisions
And now you’re afraid of upsetting him …you have to talk to him about
What’s going on .”

She stopped setting the camera down
She started to cry …
In 5 years I had never seen Sara cry
So I just held her
And said nothing

New York #1

photo origin

When you think of New York
You don’t think of buildings
Or population
Of the weather …
The smell of asphalt
Wet and burning
Which makes the people
Feel more like
Rodents running
You think of
At least I did

I was telling my sister
This at her bar
I great little place
A hole in the wall
I love coming here to relax
play piano at the window
Watching all the people
Moving in and out

She just looked at me
With that expression
And then said
“That’s a whole lot of hyperbole
My bar is getting taxed to death
I can’t pay rent for my apartment
So I’m staying here now …
There’s something to write about.”
Then she stopped and shaking her head poured me a drink.
“Vodka make sure that’s vodka
I said pointing (she hates people pointing)
Don’t give me Rum like last time
I almost died …I could see the world just beginning
As I was falling out …I think that’s actually a quote…maybe?.”
I was only giving her a hard time

It’s vodka …she said dryly
Shooting it down the bar

I always admired her talent

“What’s really bothering you?”
I asked as seriously as I could

She just looked at me
So I went to the piano
And stopped
On the seat
Was a box
Macadamias …

Sara shouted from the bar
“Hey, Annabel came by
she had been baking…again.
She said you seemed upset
So she brought

Was great
The baker and holiday
A great find
To be in New York
To us
it’s where her degree
Brought her
And everybody loves
A city

I sat down at the piano
Shaking the rain out of my scarf
Watching the people outside
Shuffling in all their hurry
I began playing my favourite
melody for rain
Prelude in E minor

Counting the colours of scarfs
And shoots of red hair
Poking out from hats
I wondered if anyone
Ever regretted moving here?
You can’t always go backwards
Even something like this
Can sometimes
Leave you isolated
I needed to start writing
I needed to do something
But instead
I stayed
And I played
Until my sleeves
We’re rolled to elbows
My jacket on the familiar floor
And I was on Prelude D flat
“Rain drop”
As the night shuffled in …
Down the alleys
And the corners
And the rain
Long had given over
To snow