I don’t think any of us knows where it comes from, not really. You can set yourself up to be ready for it but you can’t always make it happen. Nora Ephron said writers are cannibals. We eat our own. I’ve always said we were vampires. Dottie Rambo believed in keeping notebooks near her and being ready always. It just comes to you, the writing, and you turn it over and see how many lines you can get from a single ray of light. You try to make it as clear as possible, So the reader sees what you see, hears what you hear, feels what you feel. You try to understand it. What it is to be alive… To be living…
Maybe our Hearts are like caves With burdens of their own Unique Beneath the earths crust And tho Sometimes they give in Like Samson pushing the pillars down they still hold, where it matters most… And Our hearts like caves Still have rooms To discover Still have new ways Waiting to be mapped You are still you You are still new You are still undiscovered Even after all this time -E Regardingsamuel.com
There’s a deep ache in the art… There’s a place you can go Where nobody knows How the love you held Could So easily be ashed from a cigarette … we move from mountains to valleys So easily used to the news Are we surviving ? Or are we just numb from trying … There’s a dream I keep remembering Where we follow the shadows down, we keep creating Lines across paper Making our own way … The sun keeps on setting… Blood in the water Says I don’t have much time… I still have the scars From all of those nights… There’s just enough room To build a new line word after word … Chasing some kind of Immortality a shade of sky There’s some kind of pain Some kind of rain … I’m not looking for anything But my own peace of mind … My own solitude I think I remember But I soon forget Wherever we’re going We have to leave behind …
This morning, I was not feeling it. I was anxious, sore and tired. I had 10 pallets to work and it was 3am (That’s a relatively small truck for us too) It was my sixth day in a row. On top of that, we were short handed. But my boss came in at 4am, Just to help and give me some pointers on small adjustments I could make to be more efficient with my time… You see, Every minute counts and those add up. And the truth is, it’s hard to see and hard to hear sometimes but it really is time management that either makes your day or breaks your day. It’s usually not the big things killing us. For example, Small adjustments, So easy I was almost mad that I overlooked it…but once I adjusted …. I had 7 out of 10 pallets broke down and done by 6am.
You need other people to help you grow You need that other perspective You can’t win on your own…. You need smarter people in the room You need to surround yourself with people who force you to grow and challenge yourself You need people who tell you no… You need people to help you level up.
That’s how you make it That’s how you grow That’s how you learn and how you help those around you grow And achieve their goals.
Come on back To the outside of town Where the dust and the earth and the moon get down … Get gone now, past the interstate The city lights The on ramp The mile marker My hometown My big mistake God only knows We’ve been working hard Forever now… Sinful as they come Can I lay down with you, I don’t have time To carry all this hate Got to lay it down Got to lay it down Got to get gone now Got to get away … —— We’ve got to lay it down We’ve got to drive it out Past the interstate Further on out Where the dust and the earth and the moon get down…
3. Double check and don’t forget to add the butter.
4. Hand written letters
7. Be forgiving as you can. When you reach your thirties everything levels and you understand you don’t have forever or endless opportunity. But you also know, you don’t know all you will know, you have so much left …
8. Reading on Sunday’s with coffee.
10. Old films.
11. Nora Ephron’s essays and books.
12. DVDs and 90s films (it’s really interesting to find out why we don’t have films like these anymore …you lost the dvd and vhs market so they have to have a win right out of the gate and that’s a gamble they aren’t willing to make…Matt Damon talks about it in a couple of interviews.)
13. Used book stores.
15. Christmas and Valentine’s Day.
16. Sweaters and naps
17. Cooking for company.
18. Coffee dates and walks
19. Writing essays
20. I’m particularly thankful for Humira and my doctors and specialist…sometimes it sucks taking shots every week but then I remember all those weeks in the hospital and NG tubes and surgery
I’m thankful for stories
The power of language
We can be anything we want in life but not everything – but with writing, we very nearly do …
Ethan: How are you feeling today boys? You want to do stuff today or just be lazy? Francis: I’m feeling kind of snackish…maybe the porch. Ethan: The other day I asked you and you didn’t want to do ANYTHING. Francis: Well you always want to go cave diving or bike jumping or book stores! Climb mountainy mountains! Ethan: I asked if you wanted to go to the park… Francis: Oh…wheely? Wows…I don’t ‘member that…
CRUCIBLE ——- To have a heart That beats That makes us heavy That makes us human I saw a nurse Her eyes were glazed Her face numb “Is it really this bad?” I asked “It’s worse…” She stared ahead as if she was a soldier there again, in battle… “It was one thing when we were traveling and dealing with it in New York or somewhere else…but now it’s here…everyday. That worst fear…it’s happening.”
Her shoulders and body ached and stiff From daily, over a year, constantly trying to go against this storm that now covered our maps like red during election time…
It’s easy To get caught up in a movement and lose your head. I don’t have to tell you how bad it is We all have lost Someone By now We all have lost And are losing Parts of ourselves jaded tired burned out numb Living through science as it is worked out So much like man works out salvation Two steps forward One step back In the trenches And we are losing time Time that we will not get back… Working through this You see a shift In how people want to work Are willing to work While my friends My friends with PHDs and medical degrees Are tired And numb ….
“It’s too late…” Almost ripped out of a Montgomery Alabama sermon on a Sunday “It’s too late…” We work out this struggle with time With history with ourselves While living in it And my heart aches For mother’s and fathers For husbands and workers For small businesses For our communities For our children For the nurse Who is the only thing between us and god… For the artist who doesn’t know if it’s even worth it anymore …
If you can keep your head And stand still And use the truth that is in you While all that is around you falls Create Create Build This is when we build In the trenches In the rain In the storm While all around us falls And you are tired And disillusioned When your faith is at its crucible This is when you stand You observe You face life Its pain and its loss Its joy and its mornings And you build
To create a space For all that we’ve loved and lost To hold in memory To not get caught in a quick moment Some new movement Politics And agendas To understand And know There is no quick fix in life for anything There is only consistency And for this We stand every morning Against that storm And we begin again Though we are torn And worn And stretched Our eyes look forward Our heart That beats That makes us heavy That makes us human ….
A poem for a Virgo Sun, Gemini Moon. ———- You do not have to hold up the whole world entire, Go make your bed, Clean your flat, Do your laundry, Start here… —— What does Love need to survive the day? What does hearts like ours need to survive the day? You do not need to hold up the world entire… Start here… Start here… Start here… To survive the day…
The world is hurricane And brass This burning library
This emergency room This funeral parlor With death angels And poets and priest
This moment ….waiting for the next moment to take the torch and finish the race…
It has been the poets Who meet you – With the morning With your coffee and tea… While the news barrages you Social media harasses you Your cousins don’t understand you… Wall Street And the business falls around the accident in the street, You tuck words in your pockets You read them and you feel that you have a new friend reminded, With the ambulance lights around the accident, Where life became too heavy and too real… These poets… Always present, in the corner of every emergency room Every grocery store, Handing out prescriptions and recipes for whatever season of life you’re in… —— It has been the poets Who meet you in the morning… Words in an abstract line… Mined from this thing called life… But always with you… With empathy and understanding…
“This is one moment, / But know that another / Shall pierce you with a sudden painful joy.” T.S. Eliot