Whereas

Whereas

I am not mad at God

I simply am

Unsure what else could possibly be done

That has not been done ?

And whereas

They look at you like you’re beneath them

Forever

Unheard and unseen

And whereas

The odds are bet against you

And you are fading

——

Whereas

Another breakdown

Before the storm

Another shutdown

Another hick town

Another resolution

Just before sunset

Whereas

Another tough decision

No more food

Not even a pension

Whereas God

Do you ever think about us ?

Do you ever come through

We are just dust

And we fooled ourselves thinking we were more

And our strength is fading

Whereas

All we have is less

And this empty room

Without enough language

For the pain

And the muscles broken and wore

Fading

The fall of the year

Look around
All the ghost in this room
Walking these streets
Where our hearts used to skip a beat
Catching a spark
Alone in a cold dark night
Trying to find
Trying to find
The shadow of a love I used to know
Hear all the letters I wrote burning under the floor
With the heart I cut out
Just in time
—-
I don’t know, how to save myself,my money, my time…
—-
Oh woman,oh woman,
We’ve been working…everyday since the world was reborn…
And they’ve been asleep, for so long, now the earth is split in two, those who stayed home and those who got used to the news, and worked anyway, even if it was minimum wage…
Now you hold your lip,
And all of the struggle
I can never forget
All of the ghost
All of the time…
We doubled our words
We cautioned our eyes to the light
I don’t even know you
You don’t even know
Oh my love
Oh my woman
Could you spare
My heart just this once…
We just spend time
Like dollars in a jar
But we never touch
There’s always pieces
Pieces we have to translate
Oh my love my love …
All the ghosts in this room
This town
I can’t save myself, my time, my money…my heart…
I see the things that I don’t even know…
We worked through summer
We worked
Now we smile
We smoke
We drink
And we are numb
To the pain
To the rain
To our touch
To your eyes
To your love
To your curse
To the weight of
You holding me
Through the night
We can’t even hide it
The scars and the mood
There on the floor
All of the darkness
It’s here to be bold
Let us be bold
We are not dead
We are complete .

femme érotique

We died here

A thousand times over

In the hunger

The waiting

We both arrived

We see it in each-others eyes

They have terms for her

Cold hard bitch

But she’s a grown ass woman

You get what you see

And that’s what she serves

She knows what she wants

And she goes after it

And when it’s you….

When it’s you

It’s the galaxies edge

It’s figuring out you can breathe under water

She’s a different heat…

She’s sex in heels

——

We don’t ask ourselves about the past

We don’t live there anymore

We are moving forward

——

It’s passion

It’s heat

It’s slow

It’s deep

It’s hunger

It’s her world

I’m just living in it

We’re both here

Everything else fades

There’s a different animal craving

——

We know how much we worked to get where we are….

And right now

That place is

Right here

Morning by morning

The world was flawed

The work was flawed

Impractical

Opened

The flesh, bruised

We,

We were animals

Fighting ourselves

All of this life

All of this energy

All of this

Here and now

Blown in a moment

By the wind

Gone tomorrow

What was all of that hurry?

What was all of that anxiety ?

—-

Slow it down

I put the

Words on paper

My feelings

On fire

Scorch the edges

Framed by the shadow of your body

In the morning

—-

Morning by Morning

All of this passion

Slow it down

Thicker

Hotter

Slow it down

This energy

This

Heartbeat

This flame

One body

Flesh bruised

Lips on fire

The Morning runs away …

Photo origin unknown

The Mill

The Bar.

“What’s up stoopid.”

Tara sat down across from me, her brown hair blocking the clock on the church across the street. Fortunately , part of the sun as well.

“What is that brain working on now? Who brings a book to a bar anyway?”

I stared. what do you want Tara?

I had to admit, it felt weird coming back home…the mills closed. Empty buildings, like coffins, waiting for their dead or a hotel with empty floors…just shadows of memory.

Tara smiled, lit a cigarette,

You know, you have to be 21 now.

Hey, we‘re all older.

She laughed.

I closed my book.

Asking myself why I came back home…but I really, already knew.

Maybe that was what bothered me.

Tara hadn’t changed that much. She had a way of moving through the weights and the hard moments. Seemingly unscathed.

I was not so lucky.

I took a breath. Feeling flashes of my childhood walking past me in the street.

Famous Last Words

There are some things we just won’t talk about,

It’s all in the last words

Of famous men

that’s what she would say

We are in the same room

But thousands of miles away

And what do we know

And how am I to know

The things you will never show

You’re always going away…

The papers say we won the war

But I feel as though

I lost her heart today

And all at once

I felt hollowed out

Just a lost soul

But I kept this mind

The things we’ll never know

The things you’ll never show

Can I blame you?

The blood stains the earth

The skies turn to overcast

And it’s all to shame

But one touch from her

Would end the pain

One word from her would

Send the rains

How could know?

I can’t read your mind?

We are worlds apart

I never thought I’d pack these bags

I never thought I’d be on this train

I never saw

The forecast for all the skies

There are some things

We just won’t talk about

And we spend our years

Thinking we are doing

Fine and we forget

We forget

How easy it is

To leave words unsaid

Worlds behind

with only our hearts

And

All our love

on the line

Simple Things

She dreams of little things

As she steps over the cracks in the street

And the whole wide world it seems

Is on the edge of a break down

This wet blanket of time

This overcast sky

It’s rotating now

I always whispered into the dark

It’s simple things

You take away with you

The notes on the napkin

The perfect slice of pie

And

There are certain shadows

That you just carry with you

As you go

The old man in line at the drug store

Remembers the Kennedy’s

I remember 9/11

Someone asked me what it was like

And I just looked at them

And I was sad

Because they don’t remember

The world before – the heaviness of now

MMBOP

Surge
The original animated Batman from the 90’s

But now that I’m older I think a lot about that man in line at the drug store

And I realized everyday for him must be heavy as well

And those who lived through Nixon

Or the man who told me about D-Day …

Being a teenager

The pain in his eyes

Asking me how you’re supposed to come back from that

And I remember the pain in peoples eyes after the Tornados …

We all carry darkness

And we all live in this same room

We just see it from different corners

Lit by the same light

Different points of view….

Carry the simple things

Take them with you

It’s ok to believe again

Like you once did

Create again

A little at a time

This is an old pain

Older than time

And even the stars are quilted with shadows

It just takes courage

Just one step at a time

That’s how the light is made

The moon Queen

They say, she left her heart open, in the rain…

Every Tuesday

She would pick her flowers

And write her songs

No one knows much about her

What she really thought

How she felt about things

They only remember her sadness and her tragedy

I like to think

I know what she felt,

Some nights

At 3am

I can hear her playing the piano

Its music fills the halls upstairs

Some nights

When the moon is full

And melancholy

You can see her window open

Her wide, deep, dark eyes

And her blue dress

Sometimes it’s white

But she’s only there for a minute

And then she’s gone

You might see her at the top of the stairs

Or entering someone’s room

Trying to find something she’s left behind

I’ve seen some of her paintings

Some of her sketches

And heard her songs

I think I know what it must have felt like

To be filled so full

And not know

How to express it

To feel so alone

Like an outsider

Maybe she’s still trying to work it out….

They say

You feel the fear

And the terror

If you see her face though

The pain of dying

The air turns cold

I don’t believe it

I think you see the emptiness inside of yourself

No one knows what really happened to her

Her letters

Still show up under my door

That’s when I find her paintings

Inside empty rooms

Sometimes they’re in the park

I’ve seen her walking

When the moon is full

And the fog is down,

I don’t know why she talks to me

Maybe it’s because we are both alone

Filled with things to say

And unsure of how to say them

Maybe it never goes away

Maybe it doesn’t ever let go,

Maybe we just keep on trying

Even after we’re gone….

I don’t know her name

I only call her the moon queen….

Ashes

The piano was more difficult to play now, certain chords would go missing….

The same with photographs. Some faces were familiar…others were blackened with ash and she didn’t know them…

Some days she felt like everything was good. She really had a hold on things.

Other days, she would be given a journal

And expected to write…

But the pages were burning

The words were missing…

The safest place was the window on those days.

To just sit and look outside….

She could remember some things…

But it was all the new faces that frightened her.

The new town….

Other days she would work on her next detective novel…

But she always felt, trapped,inside a burning house

And couldn’t shake the feeling,time was running out.

But then, she had felt like this since her early twenties.

Now she was…she was…