First and foremost I am a mom, well that was until night shift lol.
I have 5 children (2 biological girls and 3 chosen boys) and don’t forget my 4 legged son Jasper.
Through nursing school I was a single mom, working full time, and helping my ill parents.
I met the love of my life Adam, New Year’s Eve 2013.We recently married December 17th. Just ran to the courthouse then I came to work that night.It was spontaneous and we are responsible adults knowing I had to work that night, so I did.
Recently I have felt depressed. Up until becoming a nurse I never missed anything with the children (ballgames, choir concerts, field trips etc).
I feel like I miss a lot!
Not to mention the wonderful man I married probably thinks of me more as a ghost.
However, I love what I do. Every part of it ,except getting spit at…. that part is gross. Oh and our team saving someones life only to have them curse us the minute they can.
The pride I feel knowing I worked my butt off to get here is wonderful. Being able to look at someone and decide what they need to live is a great feeling.
However,I don’t think I will ever get enough rest or time with my family.
Sometimes I honestly feel like an outsider now. I sleep while my husband is at work, kids at school. They come home I get up and go to work.
My 15 year old daughter does not come to me with any problems anymore. I am so thankful my husband accepts her as his own (she has never had a dad) and I love the relationship they have.
However, I need to feel needed like before. I have the need to help people but now feel as though I can’t help my own family besides with money.
I feel like all I just did was vent to you…
Amanda-Emergency Nurse- Alabama