30 for 30 (emotion)

Voices

Fading

How soon I forget

The world I’m in

She walks in

Everything turns

To smoke and shadows

She has everything I could ever want

And then some

She is

Fire and rain

My eyes have always followed her across the room

You should see the way she moves

I knew when she walked in

I would miss her

This house just isn’t the same

I reach out

But she’s long long gone

Now the moon plays the blues

I watch the sky run

Like a formula one engine

Soon it’s going to storm

And she’s just like that kind of energy

Building up in the sun

She’s everything I would ever need

The only thing I believe

All it takes is a touch

And the sky rains

Desire

Photo by Ethan Bethune
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Famous Last Words

There are some things we just won’t talk about,

It’s all in the last words

Of famous men

that’s what she would say

We are in the same room

But thousands of miles away

And what do we know

And how am I to know

The things you will never show

You’re always going away…

The papers say we won the war

But I feel as though

I lost her heart today

And all at once

I felt hollowed out

Just a lost soul

But I kept this mind

The things we’ll never know

The things you’ll never show

Can I blame you?

The blood stains the earth

The skies turn to overcast

And it’s all to shame

But one touch from her

Would end the pain

One word from her would

Send the rains

How could know?

I can’t read your mind?

We are worlds apart

I never thought I’d pack these bags

I never thought I’d be on this train

I never saw

The forecast for all the skies

There are some things

We just won’t talk about

And we spend our years

Thinking we are doing

Fine and we forget

We forget

How easy it is

To leave words unsaid

Worlds behind

with only our hearts

And

All our love

on the line

Woman

Woman of the earth

She comes out in the full moonlight

inside of the quiet

Her feelings like fingers dip into a little bit

Of everything

She runs they say

with the wild things

Ten thousand miles

Under the eye of the giants

She’s dived into the mouth of the volcano

Woman of the earth

See her under the weight of

Their poetry

Their weather

Their religion

Tangled up in star signs

Her roots spread deep

What have we done for her lately?

Everything we give her

Comes with a receipt

We’ve got her

Tangled up

Tangled up

In a card

In a headline

On a stage

In a bit

Overreacting

Like strings on a puppet

Where is she now?

I keep looking

She’s a woman

She’s a woman

You can’t label,categorize,

She’s a woman

I loved a woman

Love a woman

She’s a woman

And she’s damned if she doesn’t

She’s damned if she does

Woman of the earth

She runs

With the wild things

She rises with the moon

But what…

What have we done for you lately?

Cooking and marriage

I don’t know if I should be disappointed or not in what I’m about to say,

But here goes one for the family …

if I knew I was going to die tomorrow ,

I don’t know that anything would change that drastically in my schedule…

That’s the big rewrite for us writers isn’t?

The white whale

How would we write about dying?

Maybe it’s because I used to spend so much time writing about it when I was younger

Maybe it was the depression

Maybe it was my youth

Or maybe it’s the fact that I have Crohn’s disease

And I’ve been hospitalized several times because of it…

But I like to think that now

I’m living in such a way

At such a place

That every day

I’m just happy to be here

I just want to throw a dinner party that Nora Ephron would be proud of…

I always return to her essays and books every other year.

I’m not for it, but I think it’s pretty safe to put people on pedestals once they’re dead.

She’s easily one of my very favorite people on earth and I never even met her.

I like coffee

I love my wife and my dogs

I like cooking

I like butter,

You can never have too much butter

Or olive oil

I like coffee in the morning

Hardwood floors

Cooking, did I already say that? Well, cooking is like really great sex.

I’ll cook for you before and after.

Reading a really great book

Broadway

Everyone should see broadway

It changes you

Or it should

Art is so important

It’s important that we do not sound like everyone else

That we don’t fall into an echo

I like a really great drink.

An old fashioned,

A brown derby

A Manhattan

I like Sunday’s

Sleeping in…

I know you’re not supposed to rely on movies for expectations of love

But I think I like this bar I go to, it helps me write,

But it’s also, because there’s this table that I sat at…

It was the first “date” if you will,

Me and my wife went on…

I always think about seeing her walk in

And I knew I wanted to watch her enter rooms for the rest of my life…

I know I can be hard edged

Sarcastic and a little bit cruel

But she’s like dark energy

She’s seductive without even trying

And she is sexy as hell in heels

she’s also every Sunday morning

Every breakfast in bed

The perfect hot coffee

And a walk in the park

She’s the Italian restaurant on the corner

She’s midnight in the rain

She’s sitting there beside me

When they have to put a tube down my throat

Because of a flare up

She’s there on the front

Smiling

When I get published

She’s got all the love

I can ever hold in these hands

I’ve seen people come and go

And she wants me

And I want her

Year after year

I know what I like

I know what I want

And I

Like her

I love her

I want her.

The one about Family Planning

That’s what it is right?

You sit down

Have a conversation with your partner

Do we want more than just these pets?

Do we want a person?

It’s not like baking a cake you know…

This will be with you for 18 to LIFE…

Some of us grow up and move out

Like “see ya only on occasional Holidays.”

Others are eating all of your favorite retirement cereal

And recording over your TiVo.

Changing your Netflix password

In short

Still living in your home,

You know,

Mixing their dirty clothes with yours.

Family planning is a real commitment.

Not one to be made in the heat of the passions sparked from cancelling plans.

Because that’s a serious thing. Once you’re an adult you realize you can stay home and drink

And cook together

And have hot sex

And just watch television together

You know what would change that?

A couple of kids.

Or worse

A couple of thirty somethings…

We’ve had the discussion many times

We decided against children

Somehow

Between my Crohn’s disease

And my wife’s

Epilepsy

I don’t see our children doing so well, unless they come potty trained and with a service animal.

(Pause for effect)

As a matter of matters

We just got back from two Doctor visits.

Neuro and OB/GYN

Five years ago

My wife got an IUD, her insurance paid for the whole thing.

This year?

We will have to shell out at-least 1,000+ dollars

For her SECOND IUD

Let that sink in….

Now I have never thought much about birth control

my opinions were always more of

Hey it’s not my body not my choice

But

if I pay the crap out of pocket on insurance

And work, work, work.

Why isn’t it on my insurance?

It turns out it is…

It says it’s 100 percent covered under our family planning.

However

Like all things there is a LOOP HOLE the size of Mount Rushmore

Leave it to these guys

I wish they had control of my bank act and retirement….

That 100 percent?

Is 100 percent of the allotted budget amount they are given

Which is 300.00 dollars.

You read it.

What if I did that to my power bill

Or my car payment

Or my mortgage…

That’s crazy!

Birth control and contraceptives should be FREE and readily available to everyone

It’s not a want, it’s a need.

And what if all other medicines were treated this way?

Or with the same stigma as contraceptives

Insulin

Or penicillin?

“Well Mister Stephens

It looks like you enjoy cake and doughnuts too much…

We are not going to cover your insulin.”

And birth control isn’t a one size fits all,Like your baseball cap.

If you work shift work

Have seizures

Are lazy

Can’t read

You’re not going to be able to remember to take a pill

On the 3rd Saturday of every month

At exactly 3:11

While reciting the months of the year, backwards.

But only while Harry Potter is streaming, otherwise – you’re pregnant Marsha.

You have to find the one that works the best for YOU…

And frankly

I know I can get a vasectomy

But that’s a little bit permanent

And

Come on

This is adulthood

We should talk about this stuff

And be open about it

I should be able to plan with my wife

And you should be able to plan with your partner

And every neighboring town should have a planned parenthood

To help with these things

Because the truth is

Even your local health department can help with the financing for these things…

But you don’t see everyone trying to close those down…

Probably because the football coach teaching sex ed doesn’t even know about it.

But hey,

If you do decide to get another pet instead,

Adopt from your local shelter

Because those guys believe they are dragons

And they will love you beyond measure….

This was a humor piece but Learn more below

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/health-fitness/a23726025/birth-control-will-it-become-the-ultimate-luxury/

Letters to a Nurse #18

maybe the past has a way of reminding us

We’re not that far from who we used to be

I just wanted to say

Thank you for loving me

You’re a good nurse

A good friend

And when I’m with you

I feel so lucky

And when I’m not with you

I miss you…

I miss you…

The bed is empty without you here

Champagne can only do so much

I miss talking with you

Someone should really

Tell the others

What marriage is really like

How you have to grow

The unspoken rules

What you find yourself carrying

And how we change

no one else will do

Not a soul in a room

There’s only you…