The one about fist fights with dust 

So my wife and I, my better half, my kick ass roommate. My best friend until I hate her and then I need her to be my best friend, so I can complain about her to her, because I tell her everything. 

We had this huuuge fight the other day. 

It was terrible. There was breaking of things…Simon was upset. 

I used her blue toothbrush for a solid two minutes that morning…she specifically told me mine was the green one and I was like, got it. And then I didn’t got it. 

No that’s not what we fought about. It’s true. Totally took that toothbrush to germ warfare. There was bacteria everywhere. But it’s not what we fought about.

She is converting to some religion and I’m not enough for her anymore because we’re not equal. So I kicked her out. It was bad. 

I’m lying. That’s just not true. That’s stupidly obvious. I would be writing so much bad poetry. 

What DID happen. Was the following. It all started with a dog. No,no, it all started with coffee. 

We were sitting in bed drinking coffee, it was morning. And our dog, Simon. The graceful,lanky, 35 lb beagle mix, gracefully managed to hit me with all his 96 elbows as he collapsed on top of me. 

And as I was telling him how he is the best dog in the world. Because he is. I could smell something. And I thought to myself, gosh, my wife should really brush her teeth. 

And she was thinking the same thing…

And then we had a telepathic moment that only happens when you’ve been roommates who sleep together and share rooms together for a long time. We both looked at each other and then Simon. And I smelled him. And -it-was-vomit worthy. It was so bad, you could use it to catch a thief. 

He had rolled in something dead. It smelled like death and sewage. So I gathered him up and took him to the bath. 

It was so bad, I had to wash his collar in the washing machine and soak it in Pine Sol. That’s how bad it was. 

We walked out of the bathroom all clean. When the woman I love stormed passed me. Throwing clothes. And talking to herself. Then she Yelled at me, help me clean up this mess! I can’t take it anymore! 

I stood there, hoping that if I stayed really still maybe she would be like a dinosaur and not see me. 

Simon ran under the table and blew my cover. 

I was thinking to myself. Trying to figure out what I had done that morning to make her mad…

I was in the bathroom. No no , I was having coffee, I gave Simon a bath…

I gave Simon a bath. I changed the bed…we were having coffee …

I couldn’t figure anything out. 

So we had to talk about it. You know, like you’re supposed to. 

But not like in the way they do in law and order 

We weren’t trying to get kicked out of our building or end up in prison. 

We did it the old fashioned way. Like Hemingway. With boxing gloves and Shot Guns.  No not really. 

We talked about it. 

What really happened that morning was, we were on our phones and it was our off day. And I thought we were just drinking coffee and I was writing. She felt like we were wasting too much time on our phones. Rather than reading books or really being together. 

You have to talk about things 

Rather than post some deeply vague meme on social media and hope that a friend of a friend see’s it and just before pitching their pyramid scheme to your significant other-they mention it and THEN they know you’re really upset.

I feel like in a lot of ways, as I scroll through my newsfeed and pretend I’m not like everyone else…

We waste so much time online. I get it. I do. But no one really gives a shit. You know, I walk by people who look like, were it the 1950’s they’re  undercover pretending to eat  food. Staring and scrolling on their phones. 

Or I see them pulling from parking lots, Staring into their palms. Because that’s how you drive a car. 

What I realize. Is, it’s all a bubble. Designed for you. No one but you cares about what’s in your newsfeed. And no one cares about all your selfies. 

We will all die one day. Having spied on everyone else. And if we saw our flashback. We would say…”how do I look at Rachael.”  Because our newsfeed isn’t that big of a deal. 

So read a book. Walk a dog. Cook. Drink. Watch Frasier. 

30 for 30 #15

All the parts of me

From the past

I look back on

To recognize

How much I’ve grown

And all the loves

I thought I loved 

I look now

And know

I loved you first

And I’m amazed

Because I love you now

More than I ever did

And

I laugh

Because

I have a lifetime

To learn something new

Again

And again

And

Again

And don’t mistake me

Even when we’re fighting

I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else

I can’t imagine

Not being able

To argue with you

It’s as important to me

As all the rest

I just want to be in the same room

With you

Because

That is a room

With a priceless view.

-regardingsamuel.com 

30 for 30 #10

(Image origin unknown)

Oh my love 

Feel you dance with me 

Touch you 

In my doorway 

Come 

Walk my way 

Show me 

How you walk that way 

I’m done 

Political 

Millennial 

Poetic 

Pathetic 

Let’s get to the best 

The skin 

The seduction 

Your language 

Undresses me 

I’m not putting you 

On the moon 

We don’t walk that way 

We heat the core of the earth 

Because we move that way 

And now 

The world 

Is burning down 

But I feel you 

I feel you 

And this 

Is what we come here for 

To come 

And come 

Again 

-regardingsamuel.com 

30 for 30 #4

Turn the lights down I want to undress you 

Like I haven’t seen your body before 

I want to take my time

Touching you 

Like this is the first time 

I’ve touched you 

kissed

Your inner thighs 

Your neck 

Your wrists 

Your waist 

I don’t want to leave this place 

Here with you 

I’ll drink from your fountain 

Walk through your fire 

Again and again 

Leave your mark 

I just want you 

-regardingsamuel.com  image origin unknown 

The Margins 

I had this feeling

That I would write

Everyday about you

I got this feeling

That I had never lived

All the shit that happened

Before didn’t matter now

And

Yes,I know,

Past the scholarship

The star north

The heart break

The shit we take

Dust off the shoulder

A little bit older

Strong enough 

To be colder

You can’t take what you can’t break

And you can’t break when you try 

To please – appease – the user – abuser
I knew that would be a good way to lose her
When all you want is to loose her 

And to be alone 

She tops herself 

On her own 

Walking on the surface of the sun 

She’ll bring a light to the night 

The gravity 

Moving her energy 

From her lips 

To

The pockets of her jeans

Everything else 

Is shit so forget about it 

Dust off the shoulder

Everyone’s older

So just get over it 

I knew I would write about you 

Every day 

How could I live without you 

Love without you 

Anyway. 

It’s all notes in the margins. 

Her secrets are behind her shades of lipstick 

And it would be a shame if you can’t read. 

-regardingsamuel.com 

Letters to a Nurse #11

Hey,Beauty. 

I’m writing this and I have ice cream on my hand. It’s making my hand stick to the page, slowing down my rhythm and so that’s why you probably can’t read any of it. I could wash my hand. But – I’m cold and you’re not here to keep me warm, all I have is this blanket. Simon is not speaking to me – we are in disagreement  ( I didn’t share my ice cream) so- I’m cold and need to stay in this blanket. 

I know this is short and ridicules but I’m just thinking of you.  I can’t believe how many days and nights I missed living without you. And yet how lucky I am that we found each other again. Before we’re too old to be wise and forgetful. Then we would be smart enough to grab eachother and not let go. Only we wouldn’t, because we wouldn’t remember  anything and it wouldn’t be romantic, because we would be spending all our time trying to remember if we fed the dog or left the stove on again.

Wake me up, come to bed so I can hold you. And tell you again all the ways I love you. Making up for lost time. 

I love you. 

You’re amazing 

And sexy 

In all the best ways 

And you throw the best parties 

And 

I miss you most 

On the first 

And the last day 

Of our work weeks. 

-regardingsamuel.com 

Letters to a Nurse #8

I love our life together 

I wake up 

And walk through our home 

It’s easy enough to take this all for granted 

Just speed through the dream 

I want to remember us 

Like this 

Right here 

Getting ready 

The moments inbetween

The foreplay to a life of happiness 

Reading with you in bed 

We didn’t have to be together

We could’ve made it 

Just fine 

You don’t owe me anything 

But here we are 

Friends 

Lovers 

Undressing you 

Taking all night 

To get to know you 

Like I’ve never been with you 

But it’s these

inbetween moments 

I’m taking pictures 

I don’t want to lose them 

The candles on the table 
To set the mood 

To guide the night 

That keeps us here inside

Like a chapter in a book we’ve never read.

Arm crossed lovers reading it together in bed. 

-regardingsamuel.com

  

  -origin-Ethan Bethune