Intention

I feel very lucky
And I feel very overwhelmed by the awesome responsibility of being a father …
Raising a son and sending him off into adulthood…
I consider how much I struggled and tried to figure out
Even the small things …
Shaving, picking out a suit,
How to budget, how to invest, how to save …

Gladwell said it takes 10,000 hours to master a new ability or skill….
But in our time…
By the age of 21
We’ve clocked 10,000 hours playing a video game or binge watching a tv show …

Psychologist say we’re stuck in adolescence pushing it to 24 …
Failure to launch…trial independence ending at 29…
How
We love the story of the prodigal son…
Irresponsible and coming home to a fathers love …
Only in our time we have sons waiting for fathers to come home, to take on responsibility…to stop drinking …to stop leaving…
——
Is this what we came here for?
Young men
Stumbling into adulthood
Not really quite sure where it begins
And what to leave behind
What to sacrifice
And what to take up as responsibility
What the worth is…in living this way…
——
Intention
——
It’s quiet
It’s just knowing the process
And trusting it
It’s holding eachother accountable to success…
To pride and honor
To responsibility
So we leave no one behind
We don’t stumble forward …
It’s walking with each other and teaching the processes, how to step into adulthood …
So I have this window of opportunity…
I have maybe ten years to prepare for this …
But if I’m selfish …
I’ll miss it…
——
I’ll miss it with what is easy…
What is comfortable …
I’ll miss it…
—-
Don’t miss it…
You only get so much time …
10,000 hours
Maybe it’s not enough to just send them out…
Maybe it’s more …
Maybe it’s showing them how to live
How to question
How to understand
How to fix the broken things
How to know the worth of things and not just the cost …
How to move into adulthood ….

So I feel very lucky …
And I feel overwhelmed by the awesome responsibility of being a father …
Maybe we all feel this way …
But there is time to prepare
If you only take advantage of the opportunity. No it won’t be easy. But it will be worth it. What else is there?
-E

Caves

Photo by Ethan Bethune

Maybe our Hearts
are like caves
With burdens of their own
Unique
Beneath the earths crust
And tho
Sometimes they give in
Like Samson pushing the pillars down
they still hold, where it matters most…
And
Our hearts like caves
Still have rooms
To discover
Still have new ways
Waiting to be mapped
You are still you
You are still new
You are still undiscovered
Even after all this time
-E
Regardingsamuel.com

Why I’m leaving social media

UPDATE

I’ve always believed in creating a safe space where everyone and anyone
is welcome to escape and read
Be encouraged or cry and learn…
An ad free space (until this year) at Regardingsamuel.com
I always thought about our library trips growing up and wanted to re create that feeling.

After several weeks of considering my options and goals with several friends and reading several articles from other artist…

I’m announcing my departure from all platforms of social media starting in September.
This will include but not be limited to
Fb, instagram and twitter.

While I’ve utilized free platforms (as far back as tumblr)

It’s just not the same tool box anymore…

I find myself in this rat race to create and post everyday, just to keep up and stay relevant along with marketing myself, only to still get lost in an algorithm and many of my posts don’t even get seen by my oldest regular followers anymore.

It used to be a library of sorts and now it’s just a sand storm of too much information…

I’m actually late to the exodus…
Many, many other artist, poets and writers have quietly gathered their things and left these platforms sometime ago.

You can’t use the algorithm to fight the algorithm…you will always lose…

We are the product in social media…not our art..

YOU CAN FIND ME

I will still be on patreon
Making videos and photos
And notes
You can subscribe for the price of a cup of coffee …and there will be the occasional free content there as well.

And as always I will still be at home
At Regardingsamuel.com
Endeavoring to build a safe space
And hopefully in the near future
An ad free space again.

As always,
Be kind.
And make your art
Make good art
What else is there?

Yours
Sincerely,

Ethan Samuel Bethune

Francis Cash #29

Ethan: How are you feeling today boys? You want to do stuff today or just be lazy?
Francis: I’m feeling kind of snackish…maybe the porch.
Ethan: The other day I asked you and you didn’t want to do ANYTHING.
Francis: Well you always want to go cave diving or bike jumping or book stores! Climb mountainy mountains!
Ethan: I asked if you wanted to go to the park…
Francis: Oh…wheely? Wows…I don’t ‘member that…

Your Days (on the level)

For what it’s worth,
You matter,
Your days are still yours, no one else’s
If you don’t feel like creating
It’s ok,
That’s why we have dark winters
And midnight
But even the memes you share
The menus you read
The watch and the band
So many simple things
Were created
And styled
Let yourself
Be yourself
——-
I tried to numb myself into submission
I tried to not carry it anymore
I tried to stare into the fire
And hope it would cover me
But then all things leveled
To eye level
My level
I drank with the devil
My vices too
And
I saw
That there are only days
And each soul is handed the same worn used cards
They are only played differently
And I
Saw no more heavy dreams
And rains
Only work and pain
But happiness too
I saw particularly
Participation
Rather than blind optimism
Risk and chance
And accomplishment in the end ….
——
You will keep on
You will hold love for a moment
You will win and you will lose
You will hurt
And you will be tired
But you will begin again
——-
Your days are still yours, no one else’s
You matter,
For what it’s worth…

-E
Regardingsamuel.com

The self (grace)

How do you preserve the person ?
How do you face the night
The raging flame that burns
Ash and bone
The parasite
That eats the dream
The fracking of the gut
—-//
Do all my words
Have to be useful?
Will the be picked apart in time ?
——///
Is there a room
Down the hall
The empty house at the end of the street
Where I can write passion
Where I can explore
Misery
And darkness
The cemetery of whatever is left ….
After….
The emergency ….
——//
The empty
surgery room
Butchers floor
Cutting room
Be careful
Not to lose yourself children
Be careful in the cut
In the name of progress
Hear the boots on the ground
The silence
The birds are not flying
They are not singing
We are changing
The moon is red
Is there enough bread
To feed our souls at night
—-///
——-///
All I try
Is to preserve the self
The passion
The pain
The agony
The pleasure
———///
When you have loss
You cannot just walk out from that room
——///
A best friend
A father
A lover
An ideal
—-////
You know once you enter it
That room
You will forever be changed
Let it change you
——///
And stand
In the dark places

Love
Love
Love
Passionately
For we are all dissolving
And time is running
While we sleep
—-/
While we sleep
—//
How do you preserve the person
In grace
In value
In time

-E
Regardingsamuel.com

Francis Cash #25

Francis: Hey, hey, hey, Wake up, did you hear the winds?
Ethan: What? Get your paw off my nose.
Francis: what if the powers go out?
Ethan: They won’t.
Francis: What if we run out of snax?
Ethan: we won’t.
Francis: what if it’s aliens?
Ethan: it’s not.
Francis: aren’t you scared?
Ethan: whatever will be will be.
Francis: what about tomorrows?
Ethan: the future is not ours to see.
Francis: ….
Francis: will you sing to me?
Ethan: No.