Bleeding Ink #1,380

Life is change

Adapting

Adjusting

Do not hold yourself

Down to a fresh start

Or a clean slate

You carry experiences with you

Love, with you

Wherever you go

—

Life changes so fast

It’s like lightning over water

It will leave you breathless

Stay true to you

How easy it would be for me

To crucify myself

Maybe I could have been different

Maybe I could have changed

Maybe –

Is lost in the past

Keep looking forward

—-

Not everyone adapts

Not everyone makes it this far

We are constantly dissolving

—

Be gentle with yourself

Continue moving forward

—-

Life is change

Life is living

Evolving

—-

I found a box of letters today…

I will carry parts of you with me

Wherever I go

I will continue ….

Like the tide

I will continue

Nothing lasts

We are not permanent

We are here for a moment

Only just begun

Be gentle

Leave people better than you found them…

Francis Cash #3

Francis: I thought you were faking, or it was more of a suggestion… like when you read the warning label on blow dryers…

Ethan: when I say I can’t eat dairy, it means don’t order EXTRA cheese on a cheese pizza…

Francis: ok so I’ll make it up to you with some ice cream…double chocolates…

Ethan: (sighs) just make it death by chocolate…

Francis: Oh look…they have that too. I’ll call it in…

Francis Cash #2

Francis: So, how’s the Gym?

Ethan: It’s good. You know, it’s another weight to carry. (Laughs) I crack myself up.

Francis: Yeah, yeah, What’s for suppers?

Ethan: I was thinking we could try this steamed salad…and wait for the kicker, pomegranate juice…

Francis: Mmm Well that sounds healthy and nutritiously delicious.

Ethan: Francis! Put that down!

Francis: What? Do we not eat desserts first?

Francis Cash #1

Francis: Oh hey, don’t mind me, I’m just taking my bath…

Ethan: What?

Francis: Yeah just like last time, remember? Remember how that went?

Oh look, no water…

But I’m all clean…

Ethan: I feel like I’m getting threatened, should I call someone?

Francis: Look at this dirt…disgusting… good thing I’m all clean now.

Irène

"feu dans le sang"

(Fire in the blood)

"l'attente est érotique"

(The wait is erotic)

I wonder what you wrote just for you?

Between the margins?

Inside your address book?

I wonder how your letters were?

How many did you throw away?

Did you have secret lines

Only one person would understand?

—

I just reached 30

You’re 39

I wish I could ask you how this goes

—-

where loss is

How it feels

Did you feel it coming?

Did you write regardless ?

—-

I feel this guilt, like acid in my chest,

When I think about the things I don’t say

I reserve the right to write whatever I want…

—-

Nothing is permanent

And I think about that heat

I think about that loss

Like words,forgotten unused…

How many did we lose?

—-

I pour her tea

She writes on the sides of the pages of her journal

She has a novel she’s working on

She doesn’t think she’ll finish it

We can hear them coming

And it occurs to us

You can hear and feel

Life around you this

Absurd chess game we try so hard at

love coming

storms coming

These boots coming

She won’t finish this novel…

She’s 39 

feu dans le sang

I drink my tea

She’s here for a moment

I close my eyes

And

She’s gone

Like so many things

Blown away by a storm

—

The sun comes out

And I wonder

If we missed her,

I wonder how many more like her

We lost…

Quotes from

Irène Némirovsky