Francis: it is now day 10 of my hooman not being here. I think he must have gotten killded…
Ethan: France, what are you talking about? I’m right here. We took a nap together just today…
France: Was that today?
Ethan: Yeah man.
France: I’ve heard some things about Garmex, so I have made us masks out of underwear…
Ethan: I’m not wearing that. It’s not even clean and it’s germ ex or sanitizers.
France: you can’t clean clothes right now there’s no soaps!
Ethan: there’s plenty of detergent…and unsweetened tea.
France: there is!?
Ethan: so you should prob not make decisions while panicked… lets go take a bath.
Simon: Dad! Why are you not kerosened !! It’s a FANDEMIK
Ethan: I work grocery, I’ve been working all day and most nights. Let’s take you guys outside and walk.
Jazz: Hey friend! I
Ethan: Hey Cheese.
Jazz: I love cheese! Where is the cheese? Do we have cheese?
Simon: The kerosene Jazz! There’s no cheeses left.
Ethan: First off, it’s quarantine. Second, we have to go walk.
Jazz: So, why are you called dad? And how come I don’t know you?
Ethan: because we are best friends and I’m your dog sitter. I also brought you cheese.
Francis: I thought you were faking, or it was more of a suggestion… like when you read the warning label on blow dryers…
Ethan: when I say I can’t eat dairy, it means don’t order EXTRA cheese on a cheese pizza…
Francis: ok so I’ll make it up to you with some ice cream…double chocolates…
Ethan: (sighs) just make it death by chocolate…
Francis: Oh look…they have that too. I’ll call it in…
Francis: So, how’s the Gym?
Ethan: It’s good. You know, it’s another weight to carry. (Laughs) I crack myself up.
Francis: Yeah, yeah, What’s for suppers?
Ethan: I was thinking we could try this steamed salad…and wait for the kicker, pomegranate juice…
Francis: Mmm Well that sounds healthy and nutritiously delicious.
Ethan: Francis! Put that down!
Francis: What? Do we not eat desserts first?
The cow lazily grazed through the grass…waiting to roll in the…
Ethan: Hey! Don’t roll in that! Do you want another bath? What is that anyway? Ugh…gross…
Simon: Dad, I’m not Simon, I’m a cow.
Ethan: Merry Christmas, Francis Cash!
Francis: Does Christmas come with snax?
Ethan: You know what, it absolutely does.
Francis: Merry Christmas snax!
Francis: Did you bring me a snack?
Ethan: Oh shoot, I forgot the snacks.
Francis: So no snacks?
Ethan: I thought you had the snacks…
Francis: I ate all the snacks. Those were last time snacks. This is this time. What about next time?
Ethan: There will definitely be next time snacks.