Beagle in the City #255

Simon: So what do I need to know, about the cats…

Casper: Well, first, they are not dogs. And they never will be.

Simon: Ok ok, well, how do I play with him?

Casper: They don’t do fetch. Sometimes, they pounce on you, while you’re sleeping. And sometimes, while you’re just walking down the stairs…

Simon: When do they sleep?

Simon: do they know about chase the stick ?

Or roll in the grass?

Or chase the ball?

Or walk around the park?

Casper: No, but sometimes, they break things and you get blamed for it. And sometimes they jump out of no where and scare you.

Simon: Scandal!

Beagle in the City #249

Ethan: Ok boys, I need my taste testers!

Simon: I’m ready!

Garf: I call dibs! Din dins !

Lindz: not if I catch you for hugs!

Simon: Hey dad, dad, do you mind to tell mom, this is guys time. We have to test the food.

Garf: hey man, does warden, ahem, I mean, LADY, boss you around like she does me?

Ethan: hey look! Smothered chicken quesadillas!

Beagle in the City #244

Simon: Every day, dad comes home on lunches, and we go to the outside. It’s great. We play for days.

Ethan: You realize, it’s only one hour. And most people actually get to eat on their lunch.

Garfunkel: Well I’m just a starvin’ marvin, just a starvin’ marvin, I ain’t eat in three whole days!

Ethan: What are you singing? What is this?

Garfunkel: what if we all go and get sammiches.

Ethan: How about peanut butter and you guys go to the bathroom like you’re supposed to. I’m about to have to leave.

Simon: Whaaat what do you have left, a week, three days? Is it 57 minutes! No not the minutes! They are so sad!

Ethan: that’s it, I’m leaving. I’m never coming back. I’ll send you a postcard.

Garfunkel: Wait for me! Bum bum dum dum starvin’ marvin…

Beagle in the City #243

Simon: Look dad! I’m digging!

Simon: And you’re sure Moles aren’t scary?

Simon: You know one time, I knew a squirrel, he wasn’t a Mole though, have you ever seen a squirrel? You probably have.

Simon: Why are they under the ground? Is it dark under the ground? How do they see? Is it as dark as when I’m under the covers?

Simon: When do we take breaks? I could go for some snacks…

Simon: Just look at the size of this trench I dug!

Ethan: I don’t think you did as much as you think you did…

Simon: What do you mean? I’m exhausted…

Beagle in the City #242

Ethan: Ok are you ready to play Dog Golf?

Simon: I’m ready I’m ready!

Ethan: Who wants to play?

Simon: Me me me!!!

Garfunkel: I’ll just watch but thanks for thinking about me.

Ethan: Ok so I hit the ball and…

Simon: I attack the ball and bounce back and forth flying it home to dad!!

Ethan: Right!

(Moments later)

Ethan: I really am sorry.

Simon: Don’t talk to me…

Ethan: It was an ACCIDENT honest.

Garf: That was hilarious! Replay it!

Simon: Shut up!

Ethan: How could I do that on purpose! You’ve seen me play golf! I’m terrible at it!

Simon: I can’t feel my face…

Ethan: what can I do to say I’m sorry?

Garf: OH I KNOW! Call nice lady and tell her everything that happened! Here I’ve already called the number!

Garf: Hello? Hospital? Put the warden, uhh I mean, Simon’s Mom on!

Ethan: Sooo I took Simon out and was playing with him and Garf

And hitting golf balls

And accidentally hit him in the face and busted his gum. It was like right on the nose.

He had blood in his gums

And now our dog is afraid of balls…

Lindz: which one ?

Ethan: They are both our dogs. Are you saying you love one more than the other?

Lindz: No, but which one?

Ethan: Simon.

Garf: Hey man, Since you’re gonna be sleeping in my room for rest of forever, I’ve gotta tell you the tour. You’ve got a tv, a couch, a warming blanket, seriously, this thing never gets cold.

Ethan: it’s an electric blanket. And I’ll be fine.

Garf: I don’t know man, I mean, you broke your dog. Remember? He’ll probably never be the same.

Ethan: I get the fluffy pillow.

Beagle in the City #240

Ethan: Ok filthy fellas, Let’s go to the bathroom before bed.

Simon: ok but you have to go with us, because dog-nappers…

Ethan: how many times do I have to tell you, don’t watch true crime with mom while I’m gone.

L: He’s my protector.

Ethan: He’ll be the first to hide.

Garf: I don’t have to go to the bathroom. All my poop is gone.

Ethan: are you sure? You’re positive? It’s 20 degrees and we are not coming back out here.

Garf: I’m positive.

(Inside)

Garf: Ok time for Din Dins!

Ethan: Heck no! Food is gone, it’s time for bed.

Garf: But what about midnight snacks? Or second Din Din?

Ethan: I think you’ll manage for one night.

Garf: Hey, hey,

Ethan: What?

Garf: I have to go to the bathroom now.

Beagle in the City #239

Simon: Dear doggie journal, I have been stranded for three years…

Ethan: I’ve only been gone for a few hours…

Simon: It’s been a year of rain. And flood. There’s hardly any food, there have been stealings. Our kitchen is gone!

Ethan: Hey, I told you We’re remodelling it…

Simon: I am keeping cheeses and breads.

Garf: Wait, is that what was under the couch? Because you should go shopping…